Today, Everybody Gets an ‘A’

I was talking with a client yesterday. She was freaking out. Which happens during the webification process. Six Ways To Staying Optimystical…” was born in a client freak out moment. Danielle LaPorte may have mid-wived it, but the essence of it was drawn from past experience and many moments of messiness.

During moments like the one my client was having and really throughout the entire webification process, I find myself referring all of us back for a review often. The rules for optimystical web presencing can be applied generously throughout your webification adventure and really to everything else in your life and biz.

The Very Serious Business of Web Presencing

And it is serious. Tending to become more serious as we go. Even though generally speaking, my client & I are both pretty focused on a similar outcome; co-creating a unique and fully custom web presence that oozes the essence of her.

For me, this is my business. My solo-preneur business. Buck stops with me, so it’s very personal. And I take it seriously.

For you, my client, it’s serious. It requires an investment of time & resources, plus some blood, sweat and tears. Because this is your business. Your shot at entrepreneurship. And you are pretty flippin’ serious too.

So it starts serious. Gets more serious because my client, You, start figuring out that putting You out there requires some serious courage. I mean, anyone can put up a website or blog. But you are more serious (you’ve hired me & probably others!) And to put yourself out there the right way, the way that will make you money and serve your perfect people with your unique skills, gifts and talent packaged into perfect offers is very serious business!

So where do we go from “This is so serious, I gotta get this right! Jeez, I look around and see how everyone else is doing it so much more right than I am right now!!! Oh shit, is what I’m offering even for real?! I’m not even sure what that is anymore, what the hell am I offering here?!!”

Good question. And the energy or feeling behind those words are even more critical to understand. Because what you feel is what you get. It’s a “your-wish-is-my-command” kinda Universe afterall.

Overwhelmed. In a fit. Terribly confused. Questioning all of it… with her launch date looming down upon her.

What do you think the chances are of her finding a solution or some clarity here, while she’s feeling this way?

So I pulled her out of the details of her muck. I reminded her about Optimystical Rule #5 (actually, all of the rules intersect this story). I wanna know what she’s most committed to, with her web presence?

And I introduce her to Benjamin Zander. She doesn’t know him. I explain that he’s a conductor. And professor or something. And brilliant.

And that at the beginning of each class term, his students are given the assignment of telling the story where they’ve received an ‘A’ in Zander’s class.

The students write up their stories, including things like how they are feeling, what is next for them, what they are most grateful for learning/discovering, what they learned about themselves.

They return to class and turn in their completed first assignments and then Zander says to them, “Great. Good Job…

And I only take ‘A’ students.”

I told her, “I want to know what your ‘A’ story looks like. What it looks like for her to receive an ‘A’ at web presencing. And at expanding her biz, herself too (because it’s all connected). At her willingness to ask herself the good questions, to get support for the freak-out moments, to give herself the space she needed to be confused and overwhelmed.

And then bing! it was there. Relief. The tell-tale sign of right-trackedness. If there is a right (see rule #1).

What happens when you start giving A’s

“Relationships are transformed when you give an ‘A.’  When there’s a breakdown in relationship, you are not giving someone an ‘A.’” ~Benjamin Zander’s wife

In my client’s case, her relationship breakdown was with her own knowing, her inner guidance. And without her ‘A’ story, she was seeking clarity but looking at confusion. Wanting flow & ease while looking at overwhelm. What she was looking for was clearly not in the place where she was looking for it.

She had to get out of the problem to get into her solution. Telling a new ‘A’ story gives her access. Puts her in a new energetic “feeling” bubble. Her focus changes. And inspiration arrives in colorful shapes and sizes.

And at the very least, you’ve got an answer for rule #5’s question about knowing what you are most committed to. When the road gets rocky, you can find your way back to you, your own inner knowing. Reminding yourself you are committed to You. And you’ve got the ‘A’ story to back it up.

An important piece of bedrock in the serious business of web presencing.

Did I make you think?… Share your thoughts in a comment below.

  • Which people, circumstances, and relationships in your life could use an ‘A’ from you?
  • Any person or situation feel impossible to give an ‘A’to? What if you told a new story about that person/situation so they could receive an ‘A’ from you?
  • What other areas of life & biz might benefit from telling a new ‘A’ story?
  • Do you believe changing how you feel about a situation is enough to change the situation itself?

6 Ways To Stay Optimystical (And Not Go Insane) During Your Webification Process

Optimysm. Sanity. Presence.

You want a web presence. For that special thing you offer our world. For your business. It’s a big deal. And staying sane through the process of creating it is too!

Not only is your sanity important, but so is the short-term goal of getting you launched.

Here are six ways to help you stay optimystical*, sane and true to you—during your webification process.

  1. It’s never finished. All of everything is a constant evolution. Shoot for 20-70% completion and help yourself to let go and move forward. We can get caught in perfectionism, others and our own. Seriously, it will never be 100% complete and not 100% of your audience will be sending you Bravo’s everyday. If you are spending time in perfectionism, it’s distraction 100% of the time. Shoot for increments of improvement. Start with 20%. Work toward being done at 70%. If it feels risky for you to do this, that’s good. Grand slams outta the park on the first pitch rarely happen. (For more on this 70% idea, please meet Mark Silver.)
  2. There is no right way. Or a more right way to do it. There is only right for you right now. This often boils down to saying yes to what is presenting right now. Instead of waiting for the right information or figuring anything else out. Be aware of what and who is showing up, what you want and then respond which means ask for what you need and want.
  3. It’s all personal. Every last bit of it. If this is your first time creating a web presence of any kind, be prepared for your stuff to come up. How do you do with freaking out? You might have a few. What does your support system look like? It’s just a very personal process.  So what’s your plan for taking care of yourself when it gets personal? Have a relationship with your designer where you are comfortable enough to do that. To feel your way through it. Some bravery, tenacity, clear intentions. Rally your support team to blow off steam or check in with them on what their web creation process was like for perspective.
  4. You’ll know by how you feel. Whether you are choosing a web designer, looking at your first few design compositions, or even when you read a sales page… the opportunities to check in with yourself are endless. Simple as it gets: if it feels good and you get excited, then it’s for you. If you feel anything else, you have to commit to ask more questions to get clear or just move on!
  5. Remind yourself often of what you are committed to and why you are spending time on web stuff for your biz. Be clear and on purpose with your self. When the surprises that make life interesting pop up, knowing what and why you’re doing it is a huge anchor and source of guiding light along the way. Whether you are erecting your web presence for the first time or working ongoing web-related projects. This often times is about coming back to a kind of positive affirmation about trusting ourselves, affirming our worth and the personal value of understanding we are all creative at the core of our essential selves.
  6. Remind yourself often how good you’re doing. If you don’t have a web presence and want one and you think about it, give yourself credit. It’s a step. If 8 weeks ago, you didn’t have a blog presence and today you do, give yourself credit for it. Today, right now. If you write a blog post today, give yourself credit for it. Over and over and over. Wherever you are with the webification process, I cannot drive home the importance of having the skill to be able to acknowledge yourself for what you are doing. Especially where technology is concerned. It’s easy to feel stupid and that you don’t get it as well as others. Zip that shit up by reminding yourself that you’re here, today, facing in the direction of what you want.
*Original post inspired by Danielle LaPorte. More about that here.