Today, Everybody Gets an ‘A’

I was talking with a client yesterday. She was freaking out. Which happens during the webification process. Six Ways To Staying Optimystical…” was born in a client freak out moment. Danielle LaPorte may have mid-wived it, but the essence of it was drawn from past experience and many moments of messiness.

During moments like the one my client was having and really throughout the entire webification process, I find myself referring all of us back for a review often. The rules for optimystical web presencing can be applied generously throughout your webification adventure and really to everything else in your life and biz.

The Very Serious Business of Web Presencing

And it is serious. Tending to become more serious as we go. Even though generally speaking, my client & I are both pretty focused on a similar outcome; co-creating a unique and fully custom web presence that oozes the essence of her.

For me, this is my business. My solo-preneur business. Buck stops with me, so it’s very personal. And I take it seriously.

For you, my client, it’s serious. It requires an investment of time & resources, plus some blood, sweat and tears. Because this is your business. Your shot at entrepreneurship. And you are pretty flippin’ serious too.

So it starts serious. Gets more serious because my client, You, start figuring out that putting You out there requires some serious courage. I mean, anyone can put up a website or blog. But you are more serious (you’ve hired me & probably others!) And to put yourself out there the right way, the way that will make you money and serve your perfect people with your unique skills, gifts and talent packaged into perfect offers is very serious business!

So where do we go from “This is so serious, I gotta get this right! Jeez, I look around and see how everyone else is doing it so much more right than I am right now!!! Oh shit, is what I’m offering even for real?! I’m not even sure what that is anymore, what the hell am I offering here?!!”

Good question. And the energy or feeling behind those words are even more critical to understand. Because what you feel is what you get. It’s a “your-wish-is-my-command” kinda Universe afterall.

Overwhelmed. In a fit. Terribly confused. Questioning all of it… with her launch date looming down upon her.

What do you think the chances are of her finding a solution or some clarity here, while she’s feeling this way?

So I pulled her out of the details of her muck. I reminded her about Optimystical Rule #5 (actually, all of the rules intersect this story). I wanna know what she’s most committed to, with her web presence?

And I introduce her to Benjamin Zander. She doesn’t know him. I explain that he’s a conductor. And professor or something. And brilliant.

And that at the beginning of each class term, his students are given the assignment of telling the story where they’ve received an ‘A’ in Zander’s class.

The students write up their stories, including things like how they are feeling, what is next for them, what they are most grateful for learning/discovering, what they learned about themselves.

They return to class and turn in their completed first assignments and then Zander says to them, “Great. Good Job…

And I only take ‘A’ students.”

I told her, “I want to know what your ‘A’ story looks like. What it looks like for her to receive an ‘A’ at web presencing. And at expanding her biz, herself too (because it’s all connected). At her willingness to ask herself the good questions, to get support for the freak-out moments, to give herself the space she needed to be confused and overwhelmed.

And then bing! it was there. Relief. The tell-tale sign of right-trackedness. If there is a right (see rule #1).

What happens when you start giving A’s

“Relationships are transformed when you give an ‘A.’  When there’s a breakdown in relationship, you are not giving someone an ‘A.’” ~Benjamin Zander’s wife

In my client’s case, her relationship breakdown was with her own knowing, her inner guidance. And without her ‘A’ story, she was seeking clarity but looking at confusion. Wanting flow & ease while looking at overwhelm. What she was looking for was clearly not in the place where she was looking for it.

She had to get out of the problem to get into her solution. Telling a new ‘A’ story gives her access. Puts her in a new energetic “feeling” bubble. Her focus changes. And inspiration arrives in colorful shapes and sizes.

And at the very least, you’ve got an answer for rule #5’s question about knowing what you are most committed to. When the road gets rocky, you can find your way back to you, your own inner knowing. Reminding yourself you are committed to You. And you’ve got the ‘A’ story to back it up.

An important piece of bedrock in the serious business of web presencing.

Did I make you think?… Share your thoughts in a comment below.

  • Which people, circumstances, and relationships in your life could use an ‘A’ from you?
  • Any person or situation feel impossible to give an ‘A’to? What if you told a new story about that person/situation so they could receive an ‘A’ from you?
  • What other areas of life & biz might benefit from telling a new ‘A’ story?
  • Do you believe changing how you feel about a situation is enough to change the situation itself?

8 thoughts on “Today, Everybody Gets an ‘A’

  1. Mynde! Thank YOU! This is PERFECT for me right now! I need a cache of these reminders as I move through this labyrinth of self! ARggggghhhhh! If I didn’t know that the shadow side of CREATION is DESTRUCTION I could easily misread the terrain as meaning I have made a huge mistake in attempting this endeavor. Yet I know enough to know that the bigger the step, the greater the terror! No wonder people choose other endeavors: working for/under someone else. I can’t believe the waves of anxiety and constant questioning barking at the gateway of my mind!

    So once again, from your story, I hear: I am not alone. This is the terrain. Creation. Fragmentation. Darkness. Birth.

    I am engraving Benjamin Zander’s story on my heart alongside the rest. Life chants that keep me alive through the dark night. Of course YOU are my rod of strength here. So friggin grateFULL I found you! xo


  2. Just want to add…
    I am going to write my A+ story RIGHT now!
    You know its one of my WISHES! that my lover/sons/friends would assume the best of me rather than some imagined negative. As a teacher, I know that the matrix I hold of a child is what they respond to. It is like magic the sudden radical shift in their behavior. They feel it and respond like a flower to sunshine. For me the KEY in that formula is the practice in my most intimate relationships! haha! and that IS the rub, isn’t it? How can I imagine my son is doing A+ work when he is regularly late for his very expensive school? T-r-i-c-k-y!!! Yet if I am going to hold that for myself, gotta hold it for others.
    Gonna play here today. Thanks so much for the material!


    • so welcome kathleen. it would figure one of my latest (you) clients would be supportive of this ever evolving process of co-creating web presences for wonder woman across the world. I feel so very blessed to be working with amazing people who get it, and get me and want me to keep singin’ it…

      your words were a soothing affirmation for me yesterday. so Thank you!



  3. @myndemayfield new m2 = Today, Everybody Gets an ‘A’
    love the idea…what a turnaround!


  4. Kathleen you are so not alone. I was that freaking out webification woman. Comparing myself with magnificent, wondrous A+ web women. Outsourcing my voice and words and continuously giving myself a big D -.

    Mynde’s gifted guiding, and Benjamin’s magic straightened out by crippling curly whirly’s. So that I trust my inner knowing. Relax in to who I am and where I am right now. Both are perfect. This shift in thinking creating a break through. Clarity, creativity and courage. A big sigh of relief and a self-awarded A+

    So until the next breakdown…I award Mynde and other magnificent mavens lots of A+’s


    • kate,
      i’m so excited at what is in the process of being born in you. You are made of pure inspiration. i hadn’t written in almost 3 weeks. and you know, the longer you go, the harder it is sometimes to pick it up again. you keep saying stuff to yourself like whatever i write about after a 3 week hiatus better be good. i was putting the pressure on.

      and then you showed up. and brought your stuff mama. and it set us both free. isn’t that just amazing how it works. my “easy road” voice said, this would be just fine to write about m2, just pick the place where you are and start writing it. “you’ll see,” my inner knowing whispered.

      And i did and do. again. All a process. And we’re in it together. amazing to me. Thank you!



  5. Thank you, Kate! I am completely in LOVE with your site! and truly, your presence. What you say above is clearly reflected there. And yes, the soul Artist Mynde is merged with you in this effort has produced a GEM! It takes my breath away! YEAH!!!!!!

    Today I am feeling the gratitude. Today, I am clear. Today I feel strong in who I am. These waters to get here are so radical! I imagine the trip around the tip of South America and how WILD and ALIVE they are! and how terrifying they were to those first sea explorers. Yet now, there are soooooooo MANY out here who have the MAP! I am astonished! And very, very grateful.

    As soon as I make it through, I am turning around and helping others to do the same. And that is the exquisite nature of our nature and what I see in both of you. We are in the midst of RADICAL CHANGE!!!!!! xo


  6. it is actually the “waters” around the tip of south america that I imagine. I recently saw a photo of them. Scary WILD fantastic TERRIFYING and so friggin ALIVE! Thank you both for receiving me here.


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